Although I didn’t talk much about it on here, I got LTASEX syndicated in my school’s student newspaper about five months ago.  Making that happen was a rather awesome moment for me. Unfortunately, that shining moment has come to an end. As of January 8, LTASEX is dead, in the pages of The Eastern Echo.

Bottom Line: If you like penetration of the anal sort and are looking for a powerful yet versatile option at a low price, you can’t do better than The Prowler by Colt.

I know that I tend to be a bit harsh on products, but today I simply can’t. The Prowler is just too awesome.

I really hate Christmas. Sure, somewhere in my jaded alcohol fueled heart I may find some holly jolly. But frankly, unless it allows me to slink away with a bottle of merlot and a pen, I’m generally not interested. This is why, for the fourth Christmas in a row, I find myself sitting alone at the nearest watering hole that keeps its martini’s dry and its boys slutty.

Normally I wouldn’t be so swayed to go out and search for a bit of strange. But, I rather enjoy being around my own kind and Christmas tends to bring out all the damaged and disaffected stoics who share my general disdain for the wretched holiday. You know, the insatiable cynics who can‘t be bothered to muster holiday cheer that isn’t aided by some chemical or another.

Although I’m generally a more of a separatist, I’d much rather congregate with people I have something that share more with me than an unfortunate biological pairing. Plus, I find something very intoxicating about olfactory symphony created by a gin soaked, chain smoking harlot like myself.

Right now, I’m very much enjoying the one created by this racially non-descript supposed twenty-something, who’s really a thirty-something, but he’s cute so I’ll let him have his fantasy. He says his name is Frank, simple enough.

Back on December 7, The Department of Health and Human Services vetoed the FDA’s decision to allow the Plan B oral emergency contraceptive to be available to all women, without a prescription. From the reports I have seen the decision was a made because the FDA did not “’conclusively establish’ that Plan B could be used safely by the youngest girls.” In case you’re wondering, they’re specifically referring to 11.1 year-olds, which is the youngest age a girl is known to be capable of child bearing.

On one hand I think that the decision by DHHS was smart, you always want to make sure you have the best information when dealing with people’s health. But, I also think it’s idiotic to force thosefor whom the drug is safe, up to age 16, to get prescriptions.

Because the reason is semi-valid, I’m not going to puff up and get all angry. But it does make me wonder, when are we going to stop using children as a shortcut to blocking the freedoms of adults?

In last print edition of Let’s Talk About Sex, we talked about the benefits of cuddling.  Overall the piece was well received. I got a few messages from people thanking me for considering the benefit non-sexual touching in a column that normally deals with topics of the raunchier variety.

Overall, I was pretty proud of the piece, and the issue as a whole. That was until I read the print version of the column, which featured this sentence, “Get your head out of the gutter, I’m talking about cuddling.” I know that one-hundred-ten percent of people ignored the statement but, being the neurotic masochist that I am when it comes to my work, I started freaking out.

Checkmates “The Bishop” by Evolved Novelties is a “discreet” personal vibrator. It’s very simple, and sleek, although it’s not very powerful.  But that’s not to say that “The Bishop” isn’t a worthwile vibe.

Overall the design is pretty nice. I’m not a fan of the bright purple color. But since there are only two choices, Barney purple and bubble gum pink, I can’t complain too much. The shape of “The Bishop” is very reminiscent of Lelo toys, which is always a good thing.

At this point you’re probably tired of reading about fall. Yeah the leaves are beautiful, sure the food is amazing, and yes, sweaters are the most dope of all the seasonal trends, but that’s all so boring. Let’s be honest, sweaters are cool, but the best part of fall happens when the clothes come off. Get your mind into the gutter, I’m talking about cuddling!

Often cuddling gets a bad rap as something that is rather unsexy. People often connect it with hippies, those of the abstinence only sect, and clingy girlfriends. But I am here to tell you that, if you let it, cuddling can be the sexiest part of your physical affections. Lower that eyebrow and put on your softest and most comfortable pajamas, because cuddling is damn sexy.

In everything we do there is an inherent risk of something happening as a result. If you drive, you could die. If you eat, you could die. If you do nothing, you could die the most boring death ever.

So it’s no surprise having sex could kill you. The risk is improbably low, but there are several scenarios revolving around sex that could end in your death.

When I was in high school sexual education courses, those risks were exaggerated to the point that they lost all effect. But it didn’t stop them from pushing the “don’t have sex, because if you have sex you’ll get pregnant and die” message on everyone.

At the time I thought it was ridiculous fear mongering. Now when I hear sex educators berate people with horror stories and crazy images in an attempt to get them to practice safer sex, it makes me Sideshow Bob-level homicidal.

Like I’ve openly admitted, sex is risky. STIs could be a major problem, and most people’s blasé attitude toward safer sex is more than a bit irresponsible. But the fact is people will do what the hell they want to do. There is no amount of fear that’s going to stop people from making bad or unsafe decisions.

So instead of shoving blue waffle in people’s face, why don’t we simply have a rational conversation about the risks involved with sex?

Tuesday night, a new Facebook friend of mine posted a link to a website called “Is Rape Funny.” It’s a simple website which proclaims that it is “DEFINITELY NOT.” I immediately rolled my eyes.

For quite some time I have had major issues with the way that our culture has decided to deal with rape and rape survivors. Being in college and knowing several women, men, and transgendered persons whom have experienced a sexual assault of some sort, has allowed me a unique insight into the issue from many different angles. From all of that experience, as well as my work in the field of sexual education, I have concluded that no, rape is not funny. But who cares, let’s laugh about it any way.

Rape is an unfortunate part of our culture. It has been for a very long time and if I was a betting man, I’d wager that it will be for many years to come. Thus far we have dealt with rape in a fashion that I consider to be appalling.

It may seem like a simple question, “boy or girl,” and it is. But, when the future of your child’s life in relation to everyone around them is determined by the answer, it’s no longer just a question. Keep in mind the question was not male or female; nor was the question penis or vagina. Those questions would lead you to a benign medical or scientific answer that would determine the biological sex of the child. As stated in the “Gender vs. Sex” lecture notes, the term sex, only refers “to inborn biological characteristics related to reproduction, such as sex chromosomes or sex organs” (Nugent, 2011).

The question is boy or girl, which is a different question entirely. That question is seeking to determine the gender of your child. Gender is infinitely more complex than sex as it, “refers to psychological characteristics and social categories that human culture creates” (Nugent, 2011).

Whether we like it or not, we answer the question with a smile send our children coasting down a preselected path of societally acceptable behaviors that follow them until they are nothing more than a faint memory in the minds of their loved ones. Basow (2008) states, “When a child is born it is immediately labeled a ‘boy’ or a ‘girl’ based on its genitalia a label that will define the expectations and responses of others throughout its life.”

Bzzz Buddies: Pandy Personal Massager

Price: $28.99

If I’m telling the truth, the only reason I selected the Pandy Bzzz Buddies personal massager to review was because it was shaped like a panda. Again, if I’m being honest, that’s the only reason I’m keeping it around.  No, it doesn’t suck. But, I just wasn’t impressed.

Bzzz Budies Pandy personal massager is a pocket rocket vibe that measures about 5 ¾ inches long. It’s a basic vibe with no frills, other than its design, which is completely adorable. I’m a big fan of cute, and Pandy has got that in abundance. But, it’s cute in the way that Domokun and Hello Kitty are cute, which may not be for everyone since it’s not “sexy” in the traditional sense.

I'm not normally a fan of Beyonce's music video, very uninspired. But, this video is sexy in a way that we rarely see. Chack it out.

“Why the fuck do we need to

talk about sex?” asked the spunky conservative Christian woman of about 19, with a smug and triumphant smirk.

“Because people like you exist.” I replied with a look of genuine concern and exasperation.

“One day you’ll find Jesus and realize that you’re giving away your precious gift of sex and damning yourself to hell. Plus you’re a gay so that’s so much worse,” she said, mimicking my facial expression.

I opened my mouth to reply with a well-reasoned and rational explanation of why her statement was both incorrect and damaging. But all I managed to say was, “please go away.”

She obliged and left in huff, making sure that her long bleach blonde hair brushed my face as she quickly turned on her heel.

That night I went home and registered the domain LTASEX.INFO. That’s not true; I did it a week later. But, it was still a direct result that conversation.

After I registered the domain I still didn’t have any idea of what I wanted the site to be. So, I spent the next for months brainstorming ideas.

Whenever I would use someone else as a sounding board, the same question would come up, “Why do we need to talk about sex?” Even now, after the site has launched, had 2 successful years, and spawned a spin-off column in the Eastern Echo, the question still persists.

Recently, I began to feel like the work I had been doing was missing focus and structure. So, I decided go back to the beginning and rework my approach.

In that period of reflection, I figured out one very important thing that I was missing. Once I realized that this piece was missing, it seemed almost absurd that I never noticed. I mean, have you ever heard of a successful push for social change that didn’t begin with a goal?

Sure, I say things like “rehabbing sexuality” and “redefining sexual education” but what the hell does that really mean? What's even more troubling is that, upon further inspection, I realized that I had never even defined what I think “healthy” sexuality is.

It’s time to remedy that.

So, today, I present to you wonderful readers of LTASEX.INFO and Let’s Talk About Sex in the pages of The Eastern Echo a simultaneous declaration. These are the commandments of health sexuality. Not exactly a definition but these are a great starting point to look within yourself and find the areas where you can improve your sexiness quotient.

Since I know you need something good to hold you over, I have this funny clip from Penn & Teller: Bullshit. Enjoy!

Make sure you back on Thursday so can see where we're going for the next few weeks.

Oh one last thing, we will be interviewing Buck Angel this week and I need your questions! Leave a comment below or send me a email from the right sidebar. Now onto the video!

It's weird but I never thought about how attractive John Stamos is. He's quite a sexy guy... I've gotta... I think I'm gonna... BYE!

“Why do straight guys always like watching women make out and have sex? If they're lesbians it’s not like they can be a part of it.”

This is a question I get all the time. But I had no idea how to answer it.

I’d asked a few guys but they usually couldn’t explain the attraction past, “it’s fuckin’ hot!” While I understand the sentiment, that doesn’t help explain the attraction.

Then, I was reading a post on Fleshbot.com about a video of two women kissing. Apparently, it is a follow up to a photo gallery they’d post previously. In the second paragraph, author Sailor Ripley  makes everything crystal clear. She writes:

As we sheepishly meander back to the classroom, at least we can hope to walk into class today and find a gorgeous prof who wants nothing more than to rip our clothes off and nail us to the desk, or vice versa. At my school that's INCREDIBLY unlikely but a boy can dream, can't he?

Is there anything the Doctor can't fix? In this unique erotic short story of boy meets girl, we take a look at how a mutual love for a certain time lord and a bit of risk can connect two strangers.

Can they get past the awkward and get to the sexy? Is Hitler still in the cupboard? Who killed the Doctor?

I can't answer that just yet. It would, as they say...

Don’t you just love that image?! Ugh, it so hilarious! Lulz. I have never seen anything funnier or more sexist in my life! Yes sexist.

This image preys upon that ever popular idea that women are these immensely complex and insane creatures that are made to confuse the simple and sensible man. Or, as Phillip DeFranco likes to say, “bitches be crazy.”

As a kid, whenever I was feeling down, my grandmother would tell me to make the best out of a bad situation.  It never made me feel better, but I always found ways to make lemonade.  

I wonder what Chris Waitt’s grandmother gave him as advice because he decided to take his lemons and shove them into the open, festering wounds of all the women that’d been unfortunate enough to date him since middle school. I guess that wasn’t such a bad plan because from all the searing pain and, drunken, Viagra fueled tirades; A Complete History of My Sexual Failures was born.

He had a simple plan, to interview his ex-girlfriends so that he could answer two questions:

Well, here we are again. I know it's been forever since I gave you a new sex playlist, but I've got a great one for you today.

This is playlist is for what I like to call sunday sex. It's for those days where you want nothing more than to lay in bed, cuddle up, close and intimate. Those moments where sweat is the only thing you'll let come between you and your partner(s).

This playlist is slow and seductive. It melts over your sex and adds silk to your creamy sexy fun. Turn the music and lights down low. Get things swirling.

You can thank me later.

Before you get all uppity claiming transphobia, Ray has said that this is simply a parody of some straight men's fear of sleeping with a transgendered woman. Plus our resident tranny suggested the video during our interview, so you can go kick rocks.

All good things must come to an end. *le sigh*

Today we finish up our awesomely enlightening interview with transgendered man Patrick*. In this final installment (*tear*) we discuss some more... interesting topics. Including a few questions that made this cool-as-a-cucumber sexpert blush. Have you ever seen a black guy blush? It's amazing.

Anywho, enjoy.

Oh, just because this is the last post with our new friend Patrick* that doesn't mean we're closing the book on trans people and issues. Keep the questions coming and keep your hearts and mind open. Let's help make our society better for people like Patrick*. It's the right thing to do.

Today we continue our discussion with trans man Patrick*. Yesterday we covered a lot about the trans community as a whole. Now we are moving on to talk about Patrick's* personal experiences. I think this will give you a good idea of how it feels to be a trans male.

It’s hard for people who are not transgendered to get good understanding of what life is like as a trans person. Therefore we need to take the time to get to trans people. I would like you to meet Patrick* (not his real name) a 23 year old trans man living in Michigan. He has graciously agreed to be our personal representative for the transgendered experience. With him, we will discuss everything.

I hope that you read this interview and learn something about the transgendered experience. I hope that it helps you to build greater understanding and compassion for people who are too often ignored by mainstream society. Even if you only learn to stop staring, that’s still positive progress. Of course I hope for more but this is a long road.

With that, let’s jump into part 1 of our 3 part interview.  

As a sexual educator, I feel that it’s important to be overtly sex positive and inclusive. This is especially true when dealing with smaller or less socially acceptable groups or sexual activities. In my personal life, I still struggle to truly embody those feelings of connection, appreciation, and wholehearted acceptance that I try to put into the world.

For example, I often have a hard time seeing certain subtle aspects of beauty in women that I readily acknowledge in men. I also get a bit anxious when I see people engaged in anything harsher than light BDSM.

Although I try really hard, it’s impossible for me to be the go to sexpert for everyone. However, that doesn’t mean that I can’t try to be the best that I can. This is why I actively seek to understand and learn more about the topics or behaviors that make me uncomfortable. Right now, I’m focusing on expanding my understanding transgendered people and issues, aka the T in LGBT.

I'm not the biggest fan of Usher's music but I really dig this song. I was going to include it on the upcoming Sunday Sex Playlist but decided against it. Still, the song is plenty sexy and the video isn't bad either. Enjoy.