LTASEX

A friend of mine is selling Pure Romance stuff. She was telling me about this arousal cream they sell. I think it sounds cool but it cost like $15 a bottle, is it worth it. Are there any arousal creams you can recommend? Do they even work?

Short answer: Nope. None. Not at all.

Long answer: There are no products on the market that have been FDA approved to aid in arousal response. Even drugs like Cialis and Viagra simply mimic the physical symptoms of arousal by dilating a man's blood vessels allowing for more blood flow.

In my experience, arousal creams are across the board a fraud. They usually work in one of two ways. Either they have some sort of irritant like mint or capsaicin (the active ingredient in hot peppers) or they require you to massage them into your genitals for long periods.

If they use an irritant, you aren’t going to be aroused you’re going to be irritated. Your body will respond with warmth and swelling, which mimics the arousal response. In reality it is nothing more than your body freaking out, wondering why you would do such a horrible thing to it.

If they require the massage application, they are selling you lube and telling you to stimulate your genitals. You’re doing the arousal. The same arousal you could do with some spit or lube that doesn’t cost $20/oz.

Although these creams do not do as they claim, if you find they work for you then, by all means, keep using them. We do all sort of pointless things every day in the name of tradition and superstition. In the kitchen, I throw salt over my shoulder, even though it has no purpose and only causes me to be annoyed when I step on the crystals. There is no reason, if makes you feel good, why you can’t pay too much money for glorified lube.

If you feel you need assistance with becoming or staying aroused before or during sex, you could massage your genitals, but without the expensive creams. You could also try reading erotica, watching porn, talking dirty, or using sex toys such as a vibrator or dildo.

If you find that those things don’t work, try a bit of sensory deprivation. Sight and sound are the two most common ways we interact with the world. Use a blindfold and earmuffs or earplugs to remove those senses. It will heighten smell, touch and taste, which are all arguably more useful during sex. 

You should also keep in mind that women do not respond as quickly to pleasurable stimuli as men. They often need much more time to get going. Try to set aside time to devote to foreplay. You may find that the extra time at the beginning will increase your overall pleasure, level of arousal and sensitivity during sex.

Keep asking me questions.